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Memories

Delwood Ray Cavenaugh 12-22-1941 - 10-25-2008

I was told that dad had made friends with a local preacher. Dad has only liked two preachers his whole life and the other one was dead. When it was suggested that this preacher officiate his funeral, I was honored. If she's good enough for dad, she must be a wonder. Later I was told that she would be dropping by, she wanted us to share with her some personal stories about my father. Folks lets face it, I tend to like to think of myself as unflappable, of late I am well and truly flapped. I knew there was no way I could start reminiscing about my father so soon without howling like a hungry hedgehog. So I do, what I've done since the shrink suggested it in my childhood. I sat down and started writing. What follows are the things I handed to the preacher hot off the printer in georga 12 font.

  • Lived by the creed, "If man made it, man could fix it". He took great joy in it, and a special pride in repairing things that stumped others. His son noted it every time he had to call his dad on the telephone for advice.
  • Had a special quest to serve and protect the widow, no sewing machine went unfixed, no one went without fresh vegetables. He took great pride in his payment for a job well done, which took the form of the occasional cake or jar of jelly.
  • His primary hobbies were his garden and giving away most of what he grew. For a few years he sold collards from the back of his old Ford truck. The profits he made helped to pay for the following years garden.
  • He always had a great faith in the wisdom and opinions of his wife, especially when those opinions mirrored his own.
  • He retired from the textile business where he worked for over 30 years in the same building for over seven different companies. The job never changed, only the company name on the check stub.
  • Upon retirement he slowed down considerably. Fishing requires patience.
  • When he spoke of influences in his life he often quoted his late father-in-law who used to say, "What you get out of life is what you eat". Anyone who has ever tasted Delwood's BBQ knows he lived well.
  • One day two young men in suits riding bicycles came to his door and asked to come inside. Before opening the door he said to them, "In my house you are free to talk about any subject except religion and politics. Now, I'm about to sit down to lunch and if you'd like, you can join me." They ate a loaf of bread and a whole pack of bologna while he watched. All three had a wonderful visit and the young men never once broke the house rule.
  • People were important to Delwood, every day at the exact same time all work and all fishing stopped and his closest friends gathered at the barn for what they called "Tea Time". In many ways it was just like English High Tea, only they never had anything besides water from the hose to drink, and they never had cucumber sandwhiches. They were never ones for fancy finger foods.
  • Delwood took a great love of his wife's flower beds, although he often lamented how little there was to eat in them. If you walk those flower beds today you'll see his subtle influences; grapes, blackberries, strawberries, mustard greens, tomatoes, and peppers stealthily planted among the pansies, irises, azaleas, and daffodils.

Later we went to the first viewing where the immediate family decides if everything is ok with the body. While standing there looking at his corpse another thing came to mind that though too late for the preacher, was very much worth noting.

In the 30 some years that dad worked in a sewing plant he wore the height of men's fashions as often the unused samples were given to him and the other mechanics. He took great pride in looking good and his reward was the compliments he got daily from the many hundred women who sewed in the plant with him. I mention this because as his body laid there in the casket it looked better than it had looked in over a year. It was a great weight taken off of my mother and myself seeing that. Live well, die young, leave a great looking corpse. Dad thinks of everything.

Comments

woody, i am very sorry for you loss. If you need anything call me! Even if it is for just a sounding board.

jim





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